Frozen In Fear

Frozen in Fear 

July 28, 2026

I am overwhelmed with tears! Are they tears of joy? Tears of success? Tears of overcoming one of my deepest fears? Probably all 3 of these and more. I am so overwhelmed with emotions right now, all I can do is cry.

In 1989, when I was in college, my mother died. I took it pretty hard. I was very trauma bonded to her. It took me many, many years to cope with it and overcome it. I ran as hard as I could from these feelings and emotions. I drank as much alcohol as I could and smoked as much weed as I could. I had as much sex as I could, just to dull this pain even a little bit. 

I always loved school and learning. I never had any problems taking a test. My grades were good. I was a good student.

A couple of months after she died while I was at school taking a final exam for one of my classes something really freaky happened to me. The instructor went around the room and put the test face down on each of the students desks. It was a timed test. Then all at once we were allowed to turn over the test and begin taking it. So we all turned over our tests. When I turned my test over the pages were blank!!! All of them! I looked around the room and saw other students taking the test. I knew something was wrong… I felt kind of funny. I felt really numb and everything was moving in slow motion. I sat there for a while. I kept looking down at my test, still only seeing a blank piece of paper. I didn’t know what to do. So I got up and left. I left my final exam, I left my class, I left the campus. That was the day I quit college. I went home. I couldn’t cope anymore.

It was difficult for me to drive home. Luckily I didn’t live far from the campus. After I got home I felt even worse.  I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I didn’t know at that time that I was having a nervous breakdown. But I did. I had a nervous breakdown. That is what happened and it scared the shit out of me!!! This fear has stayed with me my whole life. And now I am afraid to take tests. 

I was flying at that time. I was trying to get my LTA pilot’s license. LTA is the category “Lighter than Air” which is flying hot air balloons. I was so scared to take the written test that I procrastinated for a long time. Then when I finally did I was too scared to take the commercial written test. So I only got my private pilot’s license. I just barely passed the written test. I needed a score of 70 to pass. I got a score of 72. It was easy for me to take and pass my flight test. It was the written test that freaked me out. I never got my commercial LTA pilot’s license, because I was too scared to take the written test.

I was so full of test taking fear I just avoided it throughout my life. I missed so many wonderful opportunities because of my fear. I just stayed stuck and frozen in failure mode.

Fast forward to today, 37 years later. I have healed from my mothers death. I stopped running from these painful emotions. I start healing instead. I have been clearing all of my stuck emotions with Energy Healing. It has helped me so much. I have been healing the trauma in my life. .But I still have this fear of taking written tests. 

I love sound healing. Especially singing bowls. So I wanted to get certified in this healing modality. I want to share this beautiful gift with others. But I did not pursue this for 6 years, because of being stuck in my fear. This week I made the decision to stop procrastinating and just do it. I guess I was remembering a book I read a long time ago. Feel the Fear and do it anyways! LOL! So I started the course I bought a couple of years ago. I am loving all that I am learning about sound healing. But I was pretty stressed out over having to remember everything I was learning. I have also had a few TIA’s over the years, so my memory is challenged. That just added to my fear and stress. 

My plan was to do this Level 1 sound healing course twice. I would just listen and read. Then I was going to do it a second time and write everything out and study. When I write it down I can remember it better. So I finished level 1 yesterday. I got stressed out over the thought of doing it again and writing everything down. So I said to myself Fuck It, just try… SO I DID!!!! I wanted to know how badly I would do, and OMG!!! I passed the test on my first try! And I got an 88!!! I was so shocked all I could do was cry! My emotions just exploded out of my body in a stream of tears. And the tears just kept coming. I kept on crying. I guess I am just not used to the emotions of success, of accomplishing something, of being proud of myself. I haven’t felt happy in a long time. I kept telling myself you did succeed!!! I am proud of myself. And it feels good, real good. I am acclimating to these new feelings. I am so happy that I passed this test! I have my level 1 sound healing certificate!!! So I immediately started my Level 2 training!!! Last night when I was practicing I felt so good. And I played my bowls and they sang. They sang with happiness and joy. This was my best practice session! I am happy and excited to learn more.

I am continuing my healing journey. Am I ready to face my deepest fears and tell my story? My hero’s journey? I sure hope so! But for now I am just going to keep making beautiful music! 

Love and Light,

Jai

The Happening

The Happening – A channeled CE5 message from the Sirians

What is it?

When is it? IT IS HAPPENING NOW!

Well I am going down that rabbit hole today.

I have been connecting to the Sirians during my CE5 meditations. Last week I heard them say “The Happening”. They kept saying it over and over.

Today during my CE5 meditation my intention is to hear and/or see more about “The Happening”. To get more information.

Here wee go:

I see myself. I am a Golden Light be-ing. Glowing in the radiant form of a human, not round like an orb. My whole body is tingling. My body feels very weird. I don’t feel the bottom half of my body. I am in my Merkaba. Flying above my home, going higher and higher until I am over Southwest Florida.

Then I see hundreds of thousands of ET ships. Everywhere I look the sky is filled with ET ships. It is so beautiful!!! I am overcome with Love and peace. I feel so much love from them I cry. This feeling of Love is overwhelming. I have not felt this Love here on Earth before. I tell myself to just breathe. I cannot be emotional right now. The ET’s usually pull away if a human is emotional. Especially if that emotion is fear. Will they pull away if I am overcome with Love? They do back off a little, but they do not leave. They give me a moment to acclimate to this feeling of Love. This Sirian LOVE feeling is difficult to describe, but it kind of feels like the bliss of Samadhi, but more powerful. I don’t know if that makes sense.

The Sirian’s are telling me that what I am seeing right now is “The Happening”.

Now I see Katiya. Katiya is my future Yayel self, from Essassani. I met her several months ago when I was walking on the beach one night. Katiya is here to help with contact. She says “I am here with you every step of the way”. 

I have been waiting my whole life for this. Linear time only exists here in this dimension, the 3rd dimension. So I don’t like to ask “time” questions. Most of the answers I get are wrong. But I am human and I want to know “when?” So many of us want to know when. When does it happen? In 1 month? This year? Next year? So I scoot around this and ask anyway. I want to know if what I am seeing right now, the sky filled with hundreds of ships, happens in my current timeline, in the 3rd dimension. They tell me yes, it does… I guess time will tell, LOL, no pun intended. 

I ask to see more. I see that these little ships are all around the whole planet. I see the ET docking station that I have seen before. I see another ET craft, that is just huge! It is enormous! They are telling me this is the Sirian Mother Ship. This ship is not very close to Earth, it is further away than the smaller ships. The smaller ships are all round, they are “scout” ships. The scout ships are here for first contact.

For me Disclosure and first contact are two different things. Disclosure is the Government telling the truth about their cover up in their ET involvement. Which I don’t believe will ever happen. First contact is when our star family friends can openly come to this planet in a friendly loving way. That the current human race accepts ET’s and we become a Galactic Civilization.

How does humanity react to this??? Will most people be in a state of fear? They say to me “well how did you feel?” I felt LOVE, a LOVE that is so beautiful I have not felt it before. It is so amazing! I know, again, that this is not a LOVE I have felt before in this timeline, in this dimension.

They tell me many people will be in a state of fear, and that the opposite emotion of fear is LOVE. They say we “COME IN LOVE”. Those of us that can feel the LOVE will help others who are in fear. We will transmit LOVE to the ones who are afraid. As soon as they realize and feel the love they will understand. This will be a collective awakening of the energy of love. A time for us to move back into our hearts. To return to our hearts, to return to the 5th dimension of LOVE. To vibrate at a higher frequency. To be a civilization that lives in their hearts of LOVE!

There will be many others who are also here to help awaken humanity. The Dolphins and Whales are from Sirius. They are here to help us awaken through their DNA and Lightbody upgrades. These processes will prepare people for LOVE and to be receptive for first contact.

The Arnon’s are also helping humanity with first contact. The Arnon are an ET race of Plasma be-ings. They are a very special rare starseed race. They are pink, you may have seen them if you have seen a pink orb. The color pink is the energy of LOVE.  Today there are hundreds of Arnon here. It s so beautiful!!! 

The Arnon are telling me that they will come first, for first contact. They are also escorts. I see them around all of the Sirian scout ships. They are here to bring in the Pink Energy of LOVE. I see hundreds of thousands of them. I also see AA Chamuel and Chamuel’s pink legions of LOVE Angels. I see hundreds of Pink Angels.

The Arnon are coming first with the pink Angels because humans will accept the Angels first. Then the Arnon. This will help to prepare the human race for “Open Contact”. Then the Sirian Scout Ships will start coming to those who are in a vibration of Love and who are open to communication with them. Those who are not in a vibration of LOVE will not see them. They will still be invisible to those humans who are not in an energy of LOVE. As more and more move into their heart space, they will help to anchor the frequency and vibration of LOVE here on Earth.

They keep saying, heart, heart, heart. I see my Arnon guide’s shape transform from a round shape into a heart! This is all about LOVE. LOVE transforms fear.

So “The Happening” is first contact through Love with AA Chamuel and all of the LOVE Angels. 

More and more that will be working towards open contact. At first it will be one on one, the smaller groups of Star Family contactees. Open Contact will comes in slow, soft gentle waves. They keep showing me waves and saying wave over and over.

I know we all would like to know extract dates and time when this will happen. They say it is already happening. Linear time only exists in the 3rd dimension. So whenever I try to ask “Time” questions they are usually wrong. So I just don’t. I asked if they have a definite 3rd dimensional time they could give me… they said no, LOL! But I do believe this will happen in my current timeline. So as they say… time will tell!

Stay Tuned… More will be reveled…